Why happy couples cheat and why are we so jealous?
Whether you are married or dating, people find it so hard to stay faithful. I have witness all sorts of people wanting to cheat or actually cheating. I would estimate from personal experience about 5% of men don’t cheat on their mates, while probably 85% of women wouldn’t cheat on their spouse. But now a days what is considered cheating? There’s online porn, sexting, online dating apps, massage parlors, grinning at the club, so many ways some couples might consider cheating. I was once told cheating is doing something you wouldn’t do in front of your partner, but does that really stand now a days? I personally believe there shouldn’t be walls or restrictions between couples. All fantasies and dirty thoughts should be shared but not all people share the same openmindness I have. People tend to be possessive, controlling, and of course we all know the big one JEALOUSY!! My thoughts are it boils down to self-esteem and confidence.
If you are worried that your suppose is wandering off looking for someone else to replace you, or you are getting all hissy fit that your partner is staring at someone else who’s very good looking in the room, tv, or online, all it really says is that you have ZERO CONFIDENCE in yourself and in your relationship!!! Now there are people who will cheat and their suppose is confident in themselves and in their relationship but I believe those cheat strictly for the release and not the emotional exchanges that can come about in love affairs. I will discuss the difference in cheating for love and for sex on a different post (Future post: How to know the difference between cheating for love and sex, and How you can avoid one!)
We are humans, aka animals, we have natural instincts to be aroused and want sex. The key is control. ANNNND remember the difference between sex and love. If you are in a relationship, most likely you are with them because you LOVE each other, it’s more than just sex, it’s sooo much more than just sex!!
Don’t feel threaten! Instead join your partner in admiring what they are drooling over! Remember you are on each other’s side! Join your partner in his/her arousal and make it your own. I think this is the point in your relationship where you either push each other away or get closer. If you try to control your partner, it will only make you look less attractive, and make them feel suffocated, and push them to feeling the need to hide their feelings, desires, thoughts, aka fantasies from you. Don’t create walls in your relationship by letting your insecurities take over your temperament. Don’t create fights over silly things! Life is too short to get jealous over something that is so natural to being human.
You might ask what does this have to do with cheating? Well it’s the start! Once you have made your partner know of your insecurities, you have made them more reciprocal to being attracted to other confident women. Remember to be your partner’s best friend, someone who doesn’t judge but listens.
Honesty creates trust, trust creates union, and union is what keeps you on the same side of the net.
Here’s a great video on Why Happy Couples Cheat!!